A funny thing has started to happen.
I have been voluntarily submerging myself into cold water for over four years now. This water may take the form of a lake. The ocean. A river, or a tub on my back deck. Where ever it may be there are always two common denominators. It is cold and I get wet.
Sometimes there is a lot of procrastination that occurs. The things that need to be done “right now” that have been dormant for eons, though right at this moment seem exquisitely important. Then there is the excuse dance of “later’. That is an interesting one, as later usually takes the form of never.
Or it may get to the point where I stand over the tub, river what ever it may be and I have a staring battle with the water. Almost as if I stare hard enough and long enough I will somehow have the experience of immersion without actually getting in the water, and getting wet. Cold. So far it has never happened. I am still optimistic that one day it may happen, if I get the stare just right.
Then there comes the point when I actually commit and the process begins. It as if a switch is flipped in my mind and the momentum begins to unfold. A steady commitment to the process. The knowledge that yes it will be cold and yes I will get wet.
This often brings me back to a memory of my University days and being on the swim team. I loved the exercise and the swimming. I just didn’t like getting wet. Dry swimming seems like a marvellous alternative waiting to be discovered.
Back to the process of movement. Let’s say it is the tub today. First a leg swings over the edge and a steady momentum towards the bottom for stability, with one foot gingerly probing. Next the other leg swings over the and then a further lowering of other body parts. Thighs. Hips. Stomach. Chest and finally shoulders. I am in.
At first there is a sense of wonder “why am I doing this”, and a feeling of “time to jump out, quickly”. This feeling usually passes quite soon, and then the most wonderful experience begins. A sense of profound calm and a shift. The shift from discomfort to absolute bliss. Hard to explain and seems somewhat contrary to common sense, though it does occur. It as if my body / mind are flooded with a sense of calm and peace.
With this bliss feeling comes another feeling. This can only be described as a dissolution of the separation of body and water. When it becomes difficult and then impossible to distinguish between my body and the water. We are one.
And when this moment occurs there is this incredible phenomena that occurs. There is no separation. There is no body / water barrier. There is only synergy and expansion.
I have come to live for these moments. Because in these moments there is possibility and opportunity on every level imaginable. There is never a feeling of less in these moments. There is only expansion, possibility and connection, to what is and for what may be, now and in the future.